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“They want the perfect girlfriend—in their eyes,” says Miranda, the young woman at our table.* “She’s well groomed, cultured, classy, able to converse about anything—but not bringing into it any of her real-world problems or feelings.”Miranda is 22 and has the wavy bobbed hair and clipped mid-Atlantic accent of a 1930s movie star; she grew up in a Texas suburb. He gave me money to help out with my living expenses.”It ended when she went on a school year abroad and started meeting men on Seeking Arrangement, the Web site and app which match “sugar daddies” with “sugar babies,” whose company the daddies pay for with “allowances.” Now, she says, she has a rotation of three regular “clients”—”a top Austin lawyer, a top architect, and another tech guy,” all of them married. “I signed up for Seeking Arrangement when I couldn’t pay my rent.“I’ve learned how to look like this, talk like this,” she says. She adds, “Their relationships are not my business.”She confesses she isn’t physically attracted to any of these men, but “what I’m looking for in this transaction is not sexual satisfaction. But I was held back because of the stigma if anyone finds out.”“What right does anyone have to judge you for anything you do with your body? The most surprising thing about Miranda’s story is how unsurprising it is to many of her peers.She’s talking about how she started sugaring when she was 18.“People kept telling me and my friends, ‘There are rich daddies who will take care of you.’ ”She had profiles on Seeking Millionaire and Date Billionaire when she landed a whale on Seeking Arrangement.Many of their parents were middle- or upper-middle-class people who had nothing to spare for their children, derailed by the economic downturn themselves.And so they did “cake sitting”—a specialty service for a fetish that craves just what it says—or stripping or Webcamming or sugaring.

They did what they felt they had to do to pay their bills. And no, that isn’t a rhetorical question.‘It just seemed so normal, like no big deal,” says Alisa, 21, one night at Nobu in Los Angeles, a place she’s been with her daddies.They ask for prayers: “Pray for me, this will be great to have two sugar daddies this summer since I quit my vanilla job! ”On Facebook, there are private pages where babies find support for their endeavors as well.On one, members proudly call themselves “hos” (sometimes “heaux”) and post coquettish selfies, dressed up for “dates.” They offer information on how to avoid law enforcement and what they carry to protect themselves (knives, box cutters, pepper spray).Both shows feature graphic sex scenes that sometimes look like porn.“We talked a lot about agency” when conceiving , says producer Steven Soderbergh (who directed a movie of the same name in 2009), “and the idea that you have this young woman who is going into the workforce and ends up in the sex-work industry, where she feels she has more control and is respected more than she is at her day job,” at a law firm..The anonymous writer made clear, “I’d always had personal agency.”Meanwhile, sugaring has its own extensive community online—also known as “the sugar bowl”—replete with Web sites and blogs.

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