Emotional boundaries in dating
To start by learning how to set boundaries and assert ourselves, without changing the core relationship with ourselves, will ultimately not work in the relationships we care most about.It is relatively easy to start setting boundaries in relationships that don't mean much to us - it is in the relationships that mean the most to us that it is so difficult.Rather the other person can hear us and understand is not as important as hearing ourselves and understanding that we have a right to our feelings. To own our right to speak up for ourselves." "Setting boundaries is not a more sophisticated way of manipulation - although some people will say they are setting boundaries, when in fact they are attempting to manipulate.The difference between setting a boundary in a healthy way and manipulating is: when we set a boundary we let go of the outcome." "It is impossible to have a healthy relationship with someone who has no boundaries, with someone who cannot communicate directly, and honestly.That is because, it is those relationships - family, romantic, etc.- that our inner child wounds are the most powerful.We need to start becoming aware of what healthy behavior and acceptable interaction dynamics look like before we can start practicing them ourselves - and demanding the proper treatment from others.We need to start learning how to be emotionally honest with ourselves, how to start owing our feelings, and how to communicate in a direct and honest manner.
Emotions do not define us, they are a form of internal communication that help us to understand ourselves.
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"The purpose of having boundaries is to protect and take care of ourselves.
They are a vital part of our being - as a component of the whole.) This is owning the feeling. By stating the feeling out loud we are affirming that we have a right to feelings.
We are affirming it to ourselves - and taking responsibility for owning ourselves and our reality.